咖啡人生

冷冷的环境　热热的咖啡

一杯难满足　心痒痒

多几杯深怕会上瘾　戒不了

久久一次闻一闻　才珍惜

咖啡喝多了　自然会分辨哪个好哪个不

再多么好的咖啡　也不能天天喝

偶尔来一杯淡淡或无味的

才能维持对好喝的期待

越容易得到的　越不会期待　也不会珍惜

讽刺的是

越得不到的　越会心灰意冷　干脆忘掉

以免心碎

一个人能有多坚强 要凭多少时间来断定呢？

一天？一年？十年？半世纪？

还是他的一生？

我唯一相信是　人总有会失败的时候

会跌会痛会哭　人生才算完整

回忆起来

脆弱的日子　换来更踏实的未来

咖啡　甜中带苦　苦中带香

不想只有苦而没甜

人生　有悲有喜　都带有意义

不想只有悲而没喜

我喜欢较苦的咖啡

苦多于甜

难道人生也必须是这样吗？

若不接受　唯有反抗。。。

wondering . . .

since start of university life

i've been wondering a lot

what it is going to be in there

when i'm in

what it is going to be right now

days and weeks passed by

some answers i managed to answer myself

but then new things starts making me wondering

do i have done enough or should i make more effort

i have thoughts of doing it but lack of something to start off

then again

when will i found the thing to start myself up

something been seriously lacking

i'm no different than others

but yet i want to be different from others

i've been failing in some way

will i continue to fail that way

will the thing that fail me change itself

shall i take the initiative to do something about it

clocks ticking

i kept getting old

and here i am still wondering

one last wonder

will i breakthrough

if i did, lots of thing must change

if things change

what's next

.

.

.

.

.

.

week 12 already and i'm finally have a break

all tests completed and left some minor assignments

will finish off very soon . . .

and final on 14th sep . . .

formal presentation

since week 6, i've been busying a lot

tests, practical reports, assignments

all seems like packing together like a wave

one by one hit my brain

now is week 9

and more tests and some remaining assignments

i like busy

but don't like rushing

sound so wrong

however one important thing just finished

my very first formal presentation

in a cold lecture hall with 60+ people

we're the 8th group to present

shivering cause damn cold and nervous

it went well somehow

and as usual i speak at super fast speed

not fully knowing what i split out

haix . . .

but, we're satisfied and feel good about it

our first and we did good

wish someone recorded it

while i wont dare to watch it again

a lot of things still can be improved

level up next time XD

mid 2010

another blink of an eye

it's already july . . .

half a year passed again

this time i spent the mid 2010 in university

going classes as usual

study in study room

crack my head to solve maths questions . . .

sound so bored

but it's better than nothing to do seriously

i spent nearly 3 months rotting

currently i'm getting busier and busier

assignments all showed up

mid-term test is coming also

some of the lessons not quite fully understand

nonetheless i still feel i'm new to this life

technically i already adapt to it

still something that got me hanging

telling me that this is a very unreal life

telling me what i'm studying aren't real

maybe i haven't accept it

maybe a little sooner

i had a gathering with 2 groups of people

the first one is my colleagues

having bbq in her place

it's nice to meet them again

i only know them around 7 weeks cause i left earlier

some still continue on

somehow they really good in that job

then i meet some new fellows which are doing the same job

what i feel is perhaps they have a clearer way of what are they doing

a solid feel that makes them have faith to keep on doing it

all have different backgrounds with different concerns

yet everyone continues on with life

time is never a problem

age is never a problem

what matters is that people never stop from learning things

everything we do, working or studying

we learn . . .

the second one is college-mates gatherings

i miss them so much

it's been 6 months that i've haven't met with some of them

we had chats, movies and a dinner

such short meetings

but gives me a total boost in mood

lights and colour up my day somehow

we didnt know each other for too long, not 5 not 10 years

merely 2 years

a simple happiness

at some point in my life

i met some people

they might not be important

but they can bring you a taste of long lost friends

same feel goes to secondary schoolmates

just think about them

it'll make you smile atleast 3 seconds ^^

this is a bad post

f*uck everything i feel f*uck about it

i don't know why i so f*uckingly wanna say about it

it's just so f*uck

dont expect the world so f*ucking good

actually it's just so f*ucking s*hit . . .

and i sometimes really really

so f*uckingly hate it

WHAT THE F*UCK

week 1 and week 2

finally and officially i start my university life

on 31st may 2010 9am

first class . . . sun zhi's art of war and business management

sounds cool the subject

we are the first batch to take this

dont know whether it is useful or not

but our teacher said, a lot and a lot of generals and CEOs used this book

which is 'sun zhi's art of war' to achieve success

then comes the fluid mechanic

this will be the hardest subject of this semester

after a few lessons and even reading the text book

it's still hard to understand

that's why teacher said this subject will be an open-book-test

even with the book it's never eazy ==''

mathematics for engineering

first chapter about matrix

not the usual matrix that i learned in a-level and form 5

instead a higher class matrix

and a lot of new terms like gaussian, transpose, eigenvalue, cramer's

then comes the statics

more to a physic-related subjects like the fluid mechanics as well

formula and calculations

about things that statics which is sationary or zero acceleration

the 4 subjects above all taught by lady lecturers

which quite contrast with the utar setapak campus

90% of students are guys in this campus

2 subjects below are taught by guy lecturers

survey

a subject need more in practical lessons

which is measurement and grouping datas

and the use of equipments

the interesting part should be using the equipments

introduction to bulding services

another new subject of the civil engineering course

the lecturer is a part-timer so all lectures conduct in saturday only

this subject mainly in words and very minor in calculations

about what aspects need to be consider during construction of a building

for me, a nice subject of course especially the last chapter which is about green building index

now the world go going green and this is the new trend in most engineering

after all the subjects intro

here comes the complaint part

and a lot a lot of failures during week 1

example will be

classes cancel without notice

change of venue without notice

confusion in time table

even the second version has came out, it's still confusing because lecturers still following the first version

lab register are not told properly

things do not go well i.e. low efficiency

wait here wait there

queue here queue there

failure of web portal i.e. error error error

or website down

internet access fully restrict to outside world

wi-fi more or less the same

orientation week should have inform more important things like what should be done on first and second week, rather than focusing on talks

.

.

.

and many more

unbelivable =="

anyway

i miss ktar

i miss the far more better efficiency

i miss the green and the views

once a while passby it feels good ^^

神木与瞳 | 宽恕

面对面坐着 眼神不屑一顾

挤出的笑容 看起来好突兀

我走错一步 坠入万丈深谷

还是会想起 你的荒唐糊涂

针刚刺在心上 血流已如注

背叛了幸福 拿爱当赌注

曾把感情放逐 何时能结束

遇到你我想停止游牧 让爱归真返璞

漂泊会落幕 承诺说得那么铭心刻骨

你的眼泪让我无助

你懂不懂我为爱忍辱

努力学习宽恕 原谅那错误

不甘我们的爱 死在半途

听见你的心还在哭

遗忘不及痛蔓延速度

希望你能觉悟 我真的领悟

伤口慢慢愈合 再被爱包覆

还是会想起 你的荒唐糊涂

针刚刺在心上 血流已如注

背叛了幸福 拿爱当赌注

曾把感情放逐 何时能结束

遇到你我想停止游牧 让爱归真返璞

漂泊会落幕 承诺说得那么铭心刻骨

你的眼泪让我无助

你懂不懂我为爱忍辱

努力学习宽恕 原谅那错误

不甘我们的爱 死在半途

听见你的心还在哭

遗忘不及痛蔓延速度

希望你能觉悟 我真的领悟

伤口慢慢愈合 再被爱包覆

你的眼泪让我无助

你懂不懂我为爱忍辱

努力学习宽恕 原谅那错误

不甘我们的爱 死在半途

听见你的心还在哭

遗忘不及痛蔓延速度

希望你能觉悟 我真的领悟

伤口慢慢愈合 再被爱包覆

作词: 吴本纬

作曲: 杨阳

神木与瞳 < 宽恕>

level up

this is a bad news actually

cause i had my very first minor accident

3.35pm 27th may 2010

with another sedan car

both also have fault technically

i'm (X) at a T-junction wanted to turn right

turn from a small road to a main road

the car (Y) was coming from my right side

at first the car had the left signal turned on

so i thought he gonna turn into my junction which is his left turn

as the car approaching in

it has some distance around 50 metres from my car

then i accelerate slowly to make sure the other side of the road is clear

so that i can have clean turn

so i move a little

the next second the car getting nearer

it moves at moderately low speed

the car closer and closer

another second i realize he was not going to turn

in fact he hit the brake hard and then . . .

kiss my back right door . . . =="

i should have gone faster

he shouldn't have the signal turn on

the force is hard

and my back left door did crumpled

one foot in diameter approximately

and some leftover scratch and paint

the other car

the front bumper crumpled a bit only

scratch a little and the number plate spoil a little

the hardest part hit the weakest part . . . sigh

anyway by law

i may be the disadvantage side

that's how i level up

level up on the road . . .

my very own clean record

legally drive on road

coincidently after 2 years 2 months 2 days since i got my license

then . . . TT

god bless that everyone was okay

god bless that both car still can move on

god bless that i have a new experience

god bless that there's nothing to worry anymore

what a day haix . . . good la XD

utar

at last . . . my class going to commence soon

just finish this week's orientation

it's a 4-day event

but i only attend two and a half of it lolx

the first day is collecting the goodies such as booklet and t-shirt

then there are some briefing talks and welcoming speeches

from student representatives and department of student affairs

not bad, around 300-400 freshmen attend

then i meet my old friend, ex-college-mate

we're even in the same course

second day resumes with some other talks

the important one is the loan talk

as i'm going to take a loan from ptptn

apart from the ptptn talk the others' talk only half of the freshmen from the first day attend

which prove many not really interested in others' talk

the third day

i only attend the first two talk which is briefing by the head of department and career talk

as told by the assistant professor whom gave the briefing

there's should be twelve freshmen

sadly, there's only seven of us includes my ex-college-mate and myself =="

on the other hand

i saw a notice showing that there should be seventeen of new students in civil engineering

updated on may 21st

so, there should be one class only . . .

hope a few are ladies XD

i skip the fourth day which has the telematch event

theme as icebreaking . . .

another interesting thing is

as utar is just beside ktar

i can have an alternative way of taking bus to and fro

either ktar's bus or utar's bus

the difference is . . .

the former need walk extra 10 minutes

the later need pay extra 10 sen

(what the . . .)

so now

i'm waiting for the first class on monday may 31st . . .

i've been informed i have class from monday to saturday

sad~~

a different escape

may 4th to may 6th i've went for a different holiday . . .

for me a normal holiday just resting and free from busy and stress

but this one is rather an enjoying-type holiday

location is pangkor island

the 3 days was off-peak period from tuesday to thursday

it's like the resort only 10% or less occupied

7 of us take bus from klang sentral to reach lumut

and a 25 minutes ferry trip to the island

10 years ago i step on this island before

didn't remember much of it though

we stay in coral bay resort 2km from the main jetty

the cool thing is the resort is 100m from the beach

evening, night, morning we walk to the beach

hope for a nice sunset, nice star-sky-view, nice cold breeze

but we're not in good luck i guess

sunset could have been better without cloud

stars couldn't been seen clearly, either it's thick cloud or the light is too bright

we barely see a few stars shine the second day

and about sea breeze, a very week one actually

the pasir bogak beach not that clean also, still the sea water is better than some in east coast

still have good things though

the food we having in the resort is really not bad

so much food and the lunch and dinner set we have to waste some

breakfast buffet is nice, just that milk is missing which i really hope they have it

most of our activities is by the beach

walking by the seaside, picking up and throwing stones

shell hunting and some rock-climbing to get higher view

the best activity will be the snorkeling and sight-seeing

all on a speed boat where the we run into strong winds

we snorkel one hour and then swim by a so-called private beach for half-and-hour

the snorkeling is fun and really a lot of fishes out there, colourful one is nice of course

and also the place where we keep on taste the sea water

that 'private' beach can only reach by boat cause it's a small and pretty island apart from the main island

so not much people there, in fact only our group by there that time

the beach is very clean compare to the main island's

and sea water is just so crystal-clear

first time i seen it really surprise me

because in my mind, there's really less beach that's clean unless it is really private

second day evening, we walked 2km to town and weather just so hot

simply walk around and managed to buy some local products

and on the way back, found a very very rare ice kacang stall

due to off-peak period, not much food and dessert can be found

even the people that make ice kacang also out of ice for the moment when 7 of us ordered

at the beach, saw some fellows putting kites, really professional

looking at them while they racing their kites to reach as high as possible

quite a scene by the beach, feel so relax

that night, and lucky enough, some fellow catching fish by the seaside

and the process is 'live' in front of us

they catch dozens of squid and some medium-sized fishes

a lot has 'jump' away when they pulling back the net

for a city-kidz . . . it's nice experience

another thing that surprise us is we saw some friends from our secondary school

ex-schoolmates, either is malaysia too small, or could be we have the same thoughts

i bet even if we chose some other place, we could still see some familiar faces

it's good somehow

the morning on the day we back

we spent our last activity on the beach as well

this time sand-art

lot of stuffs put on to make some good photo for cameras

other than footprints, we even use specs to decorate the sand

one that only us can make it because 7 of us wear specs

the only thing that this trip make me really relax is sitting by the beach

looking at the sun, the sand, the wave

and think of nothing else

no worries, no problems, just pure relax

''wish for another trip XD''